A Sad Duty
In the middle of the night, my phone rang. It always frightens me. The first thing I think of, is that a family member or friend needs me. Or the call will be about an animal in distress. This call was both. A friend had a small dog called Tish. Her dog has been very sick for a long time. Old age, arthritis, stomach problems, and cancer. The vet had provided excellent care for Tish, including pain medication. It had reached a point where the small dog was suffering. It was time.
The phone ringing in the night was a request for me to take Tish to the vet, and stay with her while she was put to sleep. People have such different views on allowing an animal an easy death. Some can't bring themselves to accompany the dog, other's think it is a duty to the animal that one must put themselves through. The bottom line for me is, to not judge the owner, I do what I can for the dog.
I drove over to my friends home, stopping to pick up a volunteer who would drive as I held the animal. Tish's mom looked as if she had aged ten years. She was overwhelmed with grief, sobbing as I took her dog out of her arms. Tish wasn't very responsive. Her body was so thin, and in pain. I wrapped her in a soft pink blanket and quickly left the house.
At the clinic all was ready. Soft music playing, the lighting dimmed, gentle hands and voices. My heart ached, tears flowed. I always dread the moment when I see the needle, and know there are only moments left. I cradled that tiny sick dog, kissed her, whispered in her ear that she had been the best little dog ever, that her mama loved her, and that she would be going to a place where the sun would shine, there would be no pain, she could play until her mom came to join her. For one brief moment, Tish looked at me. She was so tired. She gave me a small lick. I stroked her fur, held her close, felt her small body go limp, and just like that, it was over.
I'm always shaken. Tish was here, alive, then gone. I held her body for a long time, rocking her, patting the little bundle, whispering love into an ear that could no longer hear. There is something beautiful on those final moments. It is like time stands still, nothing moves, a sense of peace fills me. I will mourn and cry. It will haunt me, except for one thing that seems to happen each and every time I accompany a dog for the final moment. The vet says it is only my heighteded senses, listening for the heart to stop beating. I know different. I hear a fluttering sound. It's the beating of angel wings as they arrive to take another beloved pet to the rainbow bridge and beyond. When I hear that, I know I may leave, my part, my duty is done. Tish is at rest.
Written for Tish, and if possible with thanks to her Angels who carried her to the other side.
